Watched Safety Not Guaranteed (2012) by an author from
Three magazine employees head out on an assignment to interview a guy who placed a classified ad seeking a companion for time travel.

This is about 80% of the way to being a great “little film”. It’s telling 2.5 stories but only one of them really plays out and it doesn’t quite payoff.


My review

Watched Murder by Numbers (2002) by an author from
Tenacious homicide detective Cassie Mayweather and her still-green partner are working a murder case, attempting to profile two malevolently brilliant young men: cold, calculating killers whose dark secrets might explain their crimes.

It’s got Ryan Gosling in it!


My review

Watched The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997) by an author from
Four years after Jurassic Park's genetically bred dinosaurs ran amok, multimillionaire John Hammond shocks chaos theorist Ian Malcolm by revealing that Hammond has been breeding more beasties at a secret location. Malcolm, his paleontologist ladylove and a wildlife videographer join an expedition to document the lethal lizards' natural behavior in this action-packed thriller.

This is so poorly plotted that it immediately caused confusion amongst my children and that, to be honest, says it all.


My review

Listened line endings by an author from
nervous_testpilot · Song · 2021

line endings by nervous_testpilot

Watched Jurassic Park (1993) by an author from
A wealthy entrepreneur secretly creates a theme park featuring living dinosaurs drawn from prehistoric DNA. Before opening day, he invites a team of experts and his two eager grandchildren to experience the park and help calm anxious investors. However, the park is anything but amusing as the security systems go off-line and the dinosaurs escape.

This review may contain spoilers.

First watch with the children (8/11). I knew they’d struggle with the tension, so I had to chuck out some “no-one you like dies” spoilers before we even got going. But they were still appropriately terrified, especially in the breaker shed and the kitchen.

One of them wanted to stop and watch the rest tomorrow but I insisted we keep going 😈 Better to go to bed knowing what happens than have your brain trying to fill in the blanks, right!?

I obviously enjoyed but I did notice how clean Grant’s boots are when they’re in the tree and now I’ll never not be able to see that.

★★★★★ (contains spoilers)

My review

Watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023) by an author from
After years of being sheltered from the human world, the Turtle brothers set out to win the hearts of New Yorkers and be accepted as normal teenagers through heroic acts. Their new friend April O'Neil helps them take on a mysterious crime syndicate, but they soon get in over their heads when an army of mutants is unleashed upon them.

I had quite high hopes for this. The animation and characterisation are all great. The voice work is top notch. But the story is immensely trite. There should be a law against writing and producing your own work, it’s a recipe for self-indulgence.


My review

Watched Eagle Eye (2008) by an author from
Jerry Shaw and Rachel Holloman are two strangers whose lives are suddenly thrown into turmoil by a mysterious woman they have never met. Threatening their lives and family, the unseen caller uses everyday technology to control their actions and push them into increasing danger. As events escalate, Jerry and Rachel become the country's most-wanted fugitives and must figure out what is happening to them.

I wish Shia LeBeouf had been in more stuff. He seems to play pretty much the same guy every time but he does it so well.

As for the film, as conspiracy movies go, it’s not bad.


My review